SP Chapter 54: The Dethronement That Never Was

It was now lunchtime.

Carmen was the first one to the table. “I call dibs!” She decided to not wear a long-sleeved shirt, instead just wearing her blue bra as her top, with her yoga pants for her bottom.  This showed off all her fattened flesh, as she sat down, with her doughy belly protruding, and her ass squeezed into the chair. “So!  How we do?”

“I think I’m doing better.” Having recovered from the shock that was the morning, Rob was mentally equipped for the road ahead. He sat down next to her.

Mao sat across from the two. “So: this plan, is going to be something you might not be expecting.  Operation: Dethronement.  We pull this off at Barlow Island, where people see stuff going smoothly, when all of a sudden, BAM!!  Shit goes down.  The person in control, is suddenly me.”

“What?” Rob asked.

“It’s a message for the World Government.” Carmen explained. “We throw them off our trail, by having someone who apparently took control, having them think it’s a mutiny situation, when really, it’s just us agreeing here and now to try a different leadership for a little bit.”

“It’s really to give you a break, man.” Mao said. “You’ve been working REALLY hard, dude.”

Rob wasn’t sure how to react.

“...It’s TEMPORARY.” Mao said.

“Alright.” Rob agreed. “Let’s do this.”

“...You’ll be the first mate.” Mao said. “I’m not going to have you up and disappear.”

“Alright then.” Rob nodded.

“Cool, because we’re close to the dock.” Carmen said.

The Fresh Aroma docked at Barlow Island, as per the plan.  The four crew members stepped out onto the deck, with Rob and Mao facing each other.

“You can’t do that! That’s mutiny!” Rob yelled.

“Mutiny, yes.” Mao said. “I make no hiding it: I’m thinking I should take charge.”

“You? You’ll have to take my ship and crew from me of my cold dead body.” Rob stated.

One of the passerby citizens asked, “Hey, I heard you guys, like, sold cupcakes, or stuff like that.”

“Next venue.” Mao replied, facing the citizen. “Right now, we’re in the middle of something.”

“Oh, okay.” The man said, turning around and resuming on his merry way.

“First thing, you’re turning away business.” Rob snarkily said to Mao.  He then turned to the kitchen.  “Umi, somebody wants to buy some cupcakes!”

“On it!” The baker of the crew called from the kitchen, frantically stirring batter.  “I’ll have them ready soon.”

The citizen returned. “...Are you sure you guys aren’t available?”

“...Actually, you can wait,” Mao replied politely. “We’ll be out with your order momentarily, sir.”

“Oh, thanks,” the citizen said.

Mao faced Rob. “Then again, at least I don’t get swayed by women as much as you.”

Rob chuckled, both at Mao and himself.  “So… it’s a fight you want.” He removed his top hat and drew a sword from it.  “Then let us begin.”

Carmen was sitting on a chair, drinking a chocolate milkshake. “Hmmm… good stuff…” She then looked at Rob and Mao. “‘Kay, you guys should keep it clean and fair, huh?”

Mao immediately ran towards Rob, fists ready to blaze. “This is totally happening, man.  Just you… and me.”

“Very well.” Rob held his sword in front of him to block an incoming punch.

Mao then backed up, and tried doing a low sweeping kick at Rob’s legs.

Rob felt the sting of pain but quickly recovered, charging forward with a strong diagonal slash.

This nearly ended up landing a cutting wound on Mao’s right leg, instead just slicing off some cloth on his pants. “...Woah, that coulda cut me!”

“Uh, yeah.  That’s the point.” Rob raised his sword again.  “This is a FIGHT, genius.”

Carmen was tapping her foot on the deck. ‘This is taking longer than I expected.’

Mao came charging right in, both fists at his side. “ALRIGHT DUDE, COMING IN HOT!!!”

The blow caused Rob’s sword to come out of his hand.  “I don’t need it.” He leaped into the air for a diving kick.  “Take this!”

While the commotion was going on outside, Umi hummed to herself as she iced the cupcakes and carefully placed mini marshmallows on top.  “There we go! All done!”

She came outside, carrying the tray, to see Rob standing on one knee, holding out his hand to Mao.  “Alright… I concede.”

Carmen leaned in forward. “...Yes… yes…!”

However… Mao looked to be frozen. “...I…”

Carmen quickly glared at him. “You what?”

“I… I can’t DO this!” Mao snapped, storming off. “This doesn’t feel right!”

While this was going on, Umi quietly crept away to deliver the cupcakes.  “Here you are.”

Carmen walked up to Mao.  “What are you DOING?”

“Operation: Dethronement, is IMMEDIATELY feeling like a bad idea!” Mao answered. “I don’t know how to run a crew!  All I do is drop commentary, stuff like that!”

“...Fine...!” Carmen hissed.  “I can still convince Rob to do my bidding.”

Rob quickly stood up.  He then turned to Carmen and slapped her.  “SNAP OUT OF IT!” He sighed.  “Look at you, Carmen.  Look at what has been happening.  You’re basically becoming the next Lucy.  We can’t be doing this.”

“...What have I been DOING?!” Carmen asked. “OH, GOD, THIS WAS A BAD CALL!!!”

Mao popped his head back into the swing. “Hah?”

“Dethronement is cancelled.” Carmen called, with Mao coming back in the frame. “...Oh dear God, it’s that whole Lucy thing that was getting to me…!”

“Why, Carmen?” Rob asked. “What happened that changed you?”

“...Fucking jealousy.” Carmen snapped. “There, I SAID it.  I tried liking Lucy this entire time, but I just COULDN’T, and I started thinking more and more about how she had to go and all, back when that wasn’t even a THING!  I couldn’t STAND the whole thing about you and HER, being romantically inclined and all that, which kinda got ME back into dating Mao.  And like, Mao is awesome!  He’s great!  He’s the reason why I couldn’t go THROUGH with this Dethronement thing!   But it’s been literal MONTHS full of build-up, for me to reach my snapping point.  I don’t want to take over as captain either, but I need to be honest about these things from here on out, so I don’t blow up again.”

“What is it you actually WANT, Carmen?” Rob asked.

“...What I want, is to make our targets fatter.” Carmen answered. “Just go at some people with a vengeance, in addition to the people we feed normally, to nourish back to health.  I want to make some suckers into BLOBS.”

“If you want to make someone a blob, then do it.  We're pirates, we don't care what people think. If we decide someone would make a nice blob, then we feed them until they are. Like that guy over there.” Rob motioned to the customer from earlier, who was now morbidly obese, with several empty trays and a half-eaten cake next to him.

“Hey Rob, did I do good?” Umi called.

Rob chuckled “Yes, Umi.  You certainly did.”

“...What is IN our batter?” Carmen asked.

“Nothing special for us, but I'm not certain about HER.” Rob said. “She's got something in there that just makes those treats addicting.  I'll have to ask.”